| QP-405 |
"Men may come and go but jewelry lasts forever." |
| QP-397 |
"You're the answer to my prayers. You're not what I prayed for exactly, but apparently you're the answer." |
| QP-387 |
"Your friends are God's way of apologizing for your relatives." |
| QP-380 |
"The corporate ladder is best climbed in a pair of Manolo Blahniks." |
| QP-368 |
"Here's to good women. May we know them. May we be them. May we raise them." |
| QP-367 |
"The best way to get husbands to do something is to suggest that perhaps they are too old to do it." |
| QP-362 |
"Wear cute pajamas to bed - you never know who you might meet in your dreams." |
| QP-347 |
"Party ... my crib ... 2 a.m." |
| QP-338 |
"If I keel over in K'Mart, for God's sake, drag my body to Bloomies!" |
| QP-333 |
"Goodness, what beautiful diamonds! Goodness had nothing to do
with it, dearie." |
| QP-328 |
"Life's too short not to wear red lipstick." |
| QP-311 |
"When you're over fifty, your secrets are safe because your friends
can't remember them either." |
| QP-309 |
"The older I get, the better I was." |
| QP-307 |
"You will always be my best friend - you know too much." |
| QP-306 |
"Who are all these children and why do they keep calling me Mom?" |
| QP-305 |
"You look fabulous. Who did it and how much?" |
| QP-299 |
"There are much easier things in life than finding a good man.
Nailing Jell-O to a tree, for instance." |
| QP-291 |
"I am never offended by dumb blonde jokes because I know I'm not
dumb. I also know I'm not blonde." |
| QP-290 |
"If we get to drinking on Sunday, and insist you stay 'til Tuesday,
please remember, we don't mean it." |
| QP-283 |
"It's great to have a friend to grow old with. You first." |
| QP-281 |
"When life hands you lemons, tuck them in your bra." |
| QP-279 |
"Let's have a drink - It's five o'clock somewhere." |
| QP-270 |
"A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person." |
| QP-265 |
"You're a naughty boy! Go to my room." |
| QP-259 |
"I knew I married Mr. Right - I just didn't know his first name
was Always." |
| QP-257 |
"Always spend a little more money than your husband makes. It'll
keep him motivated." |
| QP-255 |
"I want to be Barbie - the bitch has everything!" |
| QP-254 |
"The reason the pro tells you to keep your head down is so you
can't see him laughing" |
| QP-251 |
"If you haven't got anything nice to say about anyone, come sit
next to me." |
| QP-250 |
"It is admirable for a man to take his son fishing. But there
is a special place in heaven for the father who takes his daughter
shopping." |
| QP-247 |
"Three wise men - are you serious?" |
| QP-243 |
"I like a martini, two of them at the most, with three I'm under
the table, with four I'm under the host." |
| QP-223 |
"May your balloon of happiness never burst no matter how many
pricks you run into." |
| QP-222 |
"Every night I say my prayers that people with money get taste
and people with taste get money." |
| QP-219 |
"To the world you might just be one person; but to one person
you might just be the world." |
| QP-218 |
"The most important thing a father can do for his children is
to love their mother." |
| QP-196 |
"A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can
spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man." |
| QP-185 |
"Can I use my Visa to pay my MasterCard?" |
| QP-184 |
"Whoever said money can't buy happiness doesn't know where to
shop." |
| QP-183 |
"Men are like linoleum. If you lay them right, you can walk on
them forever." |
| QP-182 |
"If you can't dazzle them with brilliance, baffle them with bullshit." |
| QP-158 |
"I can only please one person per day. Today is not your day.
Tomorrow doesn't look good either." |
| QP-153 |
"I like to do all the talking myself. It saves time and prevents
arguments." |
| QP-150 |
"This house is owned an operated solely for the comfort and convenience
of our dog." (QP-149 = cat) |
| QP-147 |
"Age is a question of mind over matter, if you don't mind, it
doesn't matter." |
| QP-143 |
"Acquiring a dog may be the only opportunity a human ever has
to choose a relative." |
| QP-141 |
"I don't say we ought to misbehave, but we should look as though
we could." |
| QP-134 |
"Fashion fades. Only style remains." |
| QP-124 |
"A baby is God's opinion that the world should go on." |
| QP-120 |
"When I feel the need to exercise, I lie down until the feeling
passes." |
| QP-118 |
"Work like you don't need the money, love like you've never been
hurt, and dance like no one's watching." |
| QP-112 |
"Never go to bed mad, stay up and fight." |
| QP-101 |
"From birth to age 18, a girl needs good parents. From 18 to 35, she
needs good looks. From 35 to 55 she needs a good personality. From
55 on, she needs good cash." |
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